"Honesty is the first chapter in the book of wisdom.' ~Thomas Jefferson
This week I had a little bit of a gestalt experience. While looking abysmally at a bag of clothes I finally admitted to myself that I'd never wear and had decided to try to sell on bay, I realized I'd not been paying attention.
When I contemplate buying something there are usually two things that affect my decision aside from my knee jerk 'I want that!' reaction. First there's the little voice of caution that's always double checking on every purchase I make- then there's the 'gut' feeling I may or may not have about a given garment.
The cautious voice in the back of my mind asks if I need this, if it's a good purchase considering how much I would presumably be wearing it, and if I'll actually wear it. The gut feeling is a more constant thing- more of a 'knowing.' It can be awfully soft, so I really have to listen for it- it asks not if I'll wear it, but tells me if I don't really like it or the print is just a tiny bit too loud or I don't really, really like that color, etc.
The little voice of caution is always there, with every purchase- the gut feeling isn't- it's only there if it's something I really don't like enough to buy, but think I 'ought' to (buying to please someone else, for example) or if this is something I REALLY love.
When I look at all the stuff in that bag I remember that I had that gut feeling about each and every piece- ranging from a quiet little 'that print is probably too graphic' to 'why are you thinking of this? You know you really don't like it.'
For me there's also usually a bit of a grace period- within the 30 days after buying it I usually have the opportunity to be honest with myself and go ahead and return it. That stupid bag of stuff is a reminder that over the past couple of years I got really lazy about listening to the gut feeling and being honest with myself, and having a healthier bank balance. No, instead I carried on with my self delusion and let it take up closet space that I really don't have to waste on non-working pieces. *Sigh*
Of course, this bag has been sitting there for….several months…..